[He's been smelling her all day. No - he thinks he's been smelling her, that's all. Because the thought crossed his mind, when he first spotted more newcomers in the Down: the Program is bringing more people in, it could be bringing her. His heart sours at the thought, strong enough to almost literally pull his feet from the ground.
But she's dead. It can't bring back the dead, nothing can.
The resulting crash is bad, and it puts him down for a long while. He doesn't show it much anymore, only to those who know him best: he still goes about his life, like he has since she died. He finds clothes almost as bad as what he wore to the Winter formal where he told her he loved her. He goes to the Gala, because if there are homeless kids down here, he wants to know who they are so he can get them somewhere safe.
But he smells her again. And again, and again, whiffs that keep throwing him off balance, keep him from doing the detective work he's trying so hard to get better at. By the end of the night he's accomplished near nothing, and finds himself shuffled into a room with a bunch of other submissives. He barely notices them, because the smell is getting stronger. Is he going crazy? Has he cracked? It's possible, just not likely. His skin is crawling. What is happening?
Then she walks through the door, and his heart stops.]
« « « THE KEY TO HEARTS
But she's dead. It can't bring back the dead, nothing can.
The resulting crash is bad, and it puts him down for a long while. He doesn't show it much anymore, only to those who know him best: he still goes about his life, like he has since she died. He finds clothes almost as bad as what he wore to the Winter formal where he told her he loved her. He goes to the Gala, because if there are homeless kids down here, he wants to know who they are so he can get them somewhere safe.
But he smells her again. And again, and again, whiffs that keep throwing him off balance, keep him from doing the detective work he's trying so hard to get better at. By the end of the night he's accomplished near nothing, and finds himself shuffled into a room with a bunch of other submissives. He barely notices them, because the smell is getting stronger. Is he going crazy? Has he cracked? It's possible, just not likely. His skin is crawling. What is happening?
Then she walks through the door, and his heart stops.]