[ As much as Irving longs for the pain, longs for the sharp sting to be foremost in his mind so that, looking back, he'll always remember why not to give into temptations like these again: a built-in lesson for allowing himself to act on this desire. But then--
What he also can't deny is that what he wants even more is the pleasure. Just once, just once, he wants it so much that part of him feels inches away from weeping with gratitude for it, and this is only still nothing more than Jack's fingers yet.
He breathes in sharply, like a gulp, burying a more undignified noise behind his hand as he wills his body to relax for Jack, an effort that is easier said than done (relaxation isn't something that comes easily to John Irving even at the best of times) but that he commits himself to now. ]
Please, then-- [ He agrees quickly, softly, so that he won't embarrass himself further by moaning. ] P-please, go ahead-- f-fffuh--
[ Nope. Somehow he still can't bring himself to curse. He needs to shut himself up before he blurts out something else like use me instead. ]
no subject
What he also can't deny is that what he wants even more is the pleasure. Just once, just once, he wants it so much that part of him feels inches away from weeping with gratitude for it, and this is only still nothing more than Jack's fingers yet.
He breathes in sharply, like a gulp, burying a more undignified noise behind his hand as he wills his body to relax for Jack, an effort that is easier said than done (relaxation isn't something that comes easily to John Irving even at the best of times) but that he commits himself to now. ]
Please, then-- [ He agrees quickly, softly, so that he won't embarrass himself further by moaning. ] P-please, go ahead-- f-fffuh--
[ Nope. Somehow he still can't bring himself to curse. He needs to shut himself up before he blurts out something else like use me instead. ]
I'm ready.