A man so desperate for a choice that he chose reckless abandon. Was it so different from Javert making his choice, when he felt wedged into a trap over the swirling rapids of the Seine? Javert studied Carden with the exacting scrutiny of a lead scientist. He sunk a hand deep into his whiskers and thought, stroking them with an inner anxiety barely made apparent otherwise.
Maybe that was this man's mistake: thinking he had a choice at all. Javert was under no illusion that he had much of a choice out of his placement. His choices as a Submissive were now limited to choice of with whom to contract, and choice of with whom to bed to fulfill his quota. The rest, he had to leave up to someone else, or he could simply allow himself to waste away and die. Nothing uncertain about that during his Orientation with the other Submissives. Goading that lion's-den of a gang was his attempt at accelerating his right to choose to die.
What bothered Javert most about Carden's decision to exercise his right to choice was his failure to account for what Javert himself sought. He had thought it obvious when he goaded the men to attack him. Perhaps that was the Dominant way of life that took hold after so long in the LIES program, this lack of consideration for others' thoughts.
Javert voiced none of this, however, and the rest was all very much to take in after a day of information overload. He worked terribly hard to assert his admirable self-control, suppressing a shudder here, stifling a tremor in his hand there. Yet his stare was a gloomy and dark one and it hid his own turmoil and resentment within.
"You speak like a good man," said Javert at last, slowly and quietly. He was honest about that, even if it was not goodness he wanted for himself. Water was poured, and Javert perceived that he was quite thirsty, having not a bite to eat or a sip to drink all day. He wondered if it was a faux pas for him to drink before the Dominant he accompanied, and as the thought struck him, he absently ran a finger along the mark beneath his chin.
"You have courage and a moral compass in working order. Both fine qualities for a young fellow. Whatever was done to you here does not negate that. Though I admit I have difficulty wrapping my brains around missing quota as an enforceable offense."
no subject
Maybe that was this man's mistake: thinking he had a choice at all. Javert was under no illusion that he had much of a choice out of his placement. His choices as a Submissive were now limited to choice of with whom to contract, and choice of with whom to bed to fulfill his quota. The rest, he had to leave up to someone else, or he could simply allow himself to waste away and die. Nothing uncertain about that during his Orientation with the other Submissives. Goading that lion's-den of a gang was his attempt at accelerating his right to choose to die.
What bothered Javert most about Carden's decision to exercise his right to choice was his failure to account for what Javert himself sought. He had thought it obvious when he goaded the men to attack him. Perhaps that was the Dominant way of life that took hold after so long in the LIES program, this lack of consideration for others' thoughts.
Javert voiced none of this, however, and the rest was all very much to take in after a day of information overload. He worked terribly hard to assert his admirable self-control, suppressing a shudder here, stifling a tremor in his hand there. Yet his stare was a gloomy and dark one and it hid his own turmoil and resentment within.
"You speak like a good man," said Javert at last, slowly and quietly. He was honest about that, even if it was not goodness he wanted for himself. Water was poured, and Javert perceived that he was quite thirsty, having not a bite to eat or a sip to drink all day. He wondered if it was a faux pas for him to drink before the Dominant he accompanied, and as the thought struck him, he absently ran a finger along the mark beneath his chin.
"You have courage and a moral compass in working order. Both fine qualities for a young fellow. Whatever was done to you here does not negate that. Though I admit I have difficulty wrapping my brains around missing quota as an enforceable offense."