duplicitymemes | TDM #10

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«tdm

TDM #10

« « « TEST DRIVE MEME » » »

« « « LIFE WILL GO ON

It's discouraging to think how many people are shocked by honesty and how few by deceit. Yet, solace is found in the lies we tell each other, comforted by the peace of knowing that we're not alone in our depravity, and once on this path, sin itself becomes the lesser of two evils masked in a cloud of normalcy.

This is how Duplicity has functioned since the beginning. The divide of power and social standing is overt in that Dominants influence the decisions made both publicly and privately while Submissives cater to the rules presented to them. It is the way of Duplicity to assign random designations at birth with no leeway in altering what has been given. Climate in the Up is far stricter than that of the Down; violating outlined personas for a Dominant or Submissive while in full view of others is punished by degree of infraction. In the Down, many tend to turn a blind eye to these sorts of offenses.

To counteract the discovery of the Deceit Gene – a natural "negative" response to all stimuli – the L.I.E.S. program was founded. The program had been designed to introduce new subjects to the current environment and test for the Deceit Gene through immersion in Duplicity's standing society. Sexual impulses and encounters increase the chances of detecting the gene within these individuals. Participants are typically released from L.I.E.S. after a year; however, results have remained unsatisfactory and testing still continues.

... and you’re here! Finally! Welcome to Duplicity.

After choosing a door and stepping through to the other side, the first thing that greets you are the enthusiastic faces of people in medical scrubs and pristine lab coats. Their enthusiasm translates to eagerness as they strip you of your clothes to perform a thorough examination—you will be healed, bathed, and given a paper gown to wear until your items can be processed and delivered to your residence later in the evening. You are also given a device that accesses the network as well as the time and location of orientation.

If you enter Duplicity into the Up, congratulations! You’re a Dominant, which means you are immediately picked up by a limo after processing and taken to your highrise. Here, it is two Dominants per floor with separate apartments. If you enter Duplicity into the Down, congratulations! You’re a Submissive, which means you are directed towards public transportation with the address of the motel you’ll be living in. Here, it is two Submissives per room with a shared common space for all rooms.

Enjoy your free time until orientation! Participation is mandatory by all new and old arrivals.

The weather is a brisk negative seven during the warmest parts of the day.

» » » BLINDLY WE'LL FOLLOW

It's time for the monthly Duplicity train tour. Seats are in pairs and randomly assigned to Dominants and Submissives alike. Traveling from Fiddler's Square, the train journeys through various parts of the Up, showcasing society and examples of lifestyle. Along the way, frequent stops are made; a variety of passengers can be seen exiting and entering the doors. A Dominant with a kneeling Submissive takes a seat near the front of the train at one stop. A small group of Submissives board and sit closer to the LIERS at another, all seemingly content in their roles. As the tour continues through the Up, the train passes close to the Market and White Wall Bridge and zips by North Park before heading into the Down and bypassing Red Wall Bridge and South Park.

The train makes a "final" stop at Riddler's Square, where inhabitants of the Down are instructed to return to their temporary housing. Those who live in the Up are permitted to stay on the train and revisit the same locations while returning.

« « « ASK ME ABOUT X

Along with the usual Dom and Sub seminars and demonstrations, the powers that be have decided to try something a little more friendly. After attending the mandatory classes, all characters are invited to a (mandatory) social mixer! There are beverages and light snacks, and mingling is highly encouraged.

Also, all participants have had their clothes removed and replaced with long shirts ( they are allowed to keep their undergarments, but nothing else is allowed ). Said shirts have the phrase “Ask me about _____!” plastered loudly and proudly on the front. It could be a character’s deepest, darkest secret, their most negative trait, or something embarrassing they had happen to them. Each participant is given a clipboard, pen and a piece of paper and are tasked with “asking” three others about what’s written on their chests. Once they’ve completed the task and handed in the assignment they’ll receive their clothes back. Of course, the long shirts can be removed, but that means you’ll be stuck in the nude or in your undergarments until you cooperate.

« « « ON A FLIP CHART

Not into your long shirts? Want to complain or refuse to participate? There’s another option! Unruly Dominants and Submissives will find themselves locked in a private room with a bed, stuffed together into a get-along-shirt. There’s no escaping the garment either, until certain conditions have been met. Written on a flip chart in the corner of the room are the tasks that need to be accomplished to “get along.” Are the two supposed to share a kiss? Sing a romantic duet together? Say the alphabet backwards in sync? The whole point of the exercise is to find that synergy a Dom and Sub pair are supposed to have. Maybe this isn’t the best way to find it, though…

When the conditions are met the shirt is removable or rippable. Otherwise no matter how hard the characters struggle they’ll find themselves unable to get the pesky thing off.

« « « THE LONG WAY AROUND

Many local businesses have adapted to the timing of newcomers, and take advantage of the incoming crowds to do a little marketing. Stationed throughout Duplicity in LIEr-adjacent places such as the train station, the Up Apartments, the Down Motel, and the orientation center are representatives for local businesses and companies handing out free samples and hoping to attract business later.

This month, there’s a particular presence by Harbroken Industries, a cosmetic and beauty company. They’re pushing free samples of their new pheromone perfume sprays, delicately scented and guaranteed to work. Sample bottles are freely available, but some overeager volunteers are taking the department store approach and spritzing unwitting passersby.

The citrus scent is energizing and bright, inducing a talkative state where users cannot get enough conversation, and lose any internal filter for their words. The strawberry-vanilla scent is sweet and comforting, like a warm hug, which users will get a lot of with their new obsession with physical affection. Cedar-sandalwood makes those who use it tough as nails, angry and ready to pick a fight over the smallest slights. The cinnamon-pear scent makes its users feel adventurous and curious, and maybe a little TOO bold about trying new things. And predictably, the patchouli spray inspires “free love,” with an aphrodisiac effect that gets worse over time, unless taken care of quickly.

The scents will wane and the effects will fade after six hours, or after the urges they cause are fulfilled. These volunteers are so eager to make a sale that it’s entirely possible to be hit with more than one spray at a time, so maybe take the long way around these areas if you’re looking to avoid them.

« « « MOD & OOC NOTES

Please read carefully.

On each Test Drive Meme, there will be a section noting character roles; these will vary each TDM. On an IC level, characters will still have gone through the doors but assignments OOCly are still randomized. When applying, there is a section of the application that denotes whether the character chooses "left" or "right". When participating on the TDM, there will be a third option. Players may link either a top level or a thread (five or more comments from their character) from the TDM and title the link as "Door Pass". This means that the player is choosing to take the designation that they were randomly assigned on the TDM, rather than taking the designation of a door. If the player decides to select a door rather than use the pass, then they are trying their luck; they may get the same designation they had on the TDM or the opposite. Once the application is submitted, players can't change their choice.

To assign roles to characters for this TDM, use the following guide: Count the letters in your character's full name ( first, last, middle or whatever combo that they have ). If it totals twelve letters and below they are a Dominant. If it's thirteen and higher they are Submissive.

Please remember to mark any necessary content, and have fun!!

» » » MAIN NAVIGATION « « «

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ What he doesn't say, but what she might figure out for herself with enough time, is that he was sort of forced to make friends out of necessity — allies, maybe, at first, people who found themselves stuck in the exact same situation, and it had sort of been an unspoken agreement he'd reached with some of them, trying to do the most to make a bad set of circumstances more bearable. What he doesn't say, but what she might find out soon enough, is that these friends are people he's also shared those varying degrees of intimacy with, because attitudes about that sort of thing here are more casual than he was comfortable with at first.

What he doesn't say, but what will become very apparent after enough time, is that he and Poe only had to draw on a connection that already existed to make the choice to share something deeper — and that he'd done the same thing with her, a long time ago, but she doesn't even remember it now, so maybe there's no point in mentioning it. ]

Yeah, he's — he got into a fight with the guards, when he first showed up. Got himself punched in the face and knocked out all over again.

[ And he shakes his head in answer to her unspoken inquiry, when she mimes the existence of the marks that have been inked into them both. ] No. He's in the Up, sometimes, but we've got a space down here we've been working in together. An old garage. It, uh —

[ Damn it, he's going to just have to come out and say it; he doesn't want to keep this from her. ] It belonged to you, when you were here before.

[ poe getting in a fight doesn't phase her; if anything, it puts her a little at ease, to think of poe with his fists at the ready, brows furrowed as he likely shouted and fussed the whole way down. at least something is still the same. she's equally reassured that poe and finn are together, that they've found some common space to work and rest — that the dividing line of the lines that are and aren't inked onto throats won't be enough to separate them.

what does startle her, enough that rey stops dead her in tracks, is finn's casual revelation of something she has never had in her life. something that belonged to her, something that was hers — the ownership of the garage is far more of a surprise than her own presence, but she has orientation to thank for the latter, their advisory of repeat trials and more resistant subjects occasionally being reset having given her something to think about and hate in private.

but hers? truly and really, even in her absence? ]

I had a garage? A mechanic's garage, you mean, with tools and parts and — [ she pauses, correcting herself, ships nearly out of her mouth ] — what, speeders? Was I a mechanic here, then?

[ and, a moment later, before finn has a chance to get a word in edgewise: ] Does it still? Belong to me, I mean — is it still mine?

[ if rey had ever had a christmas day to compare this to, she might consider this the best one yet. as it is, her expression is surprisingly bright. ]

[ It's a pattern he's witnessed from the currently absent third party enough times already — Poe gets here and promptly beats up a guard or two before usually needing to be subdued again the hard way, but he's also forgotten his previous time in Duplicity each and every time, so Finn's gotten used to the concept of having to do a quick explainer, at least with the parts that they don't seem to ever address during orientation.

He should've guessed that she would latch on to part of what he's said — maybe not discarding the rest, but the gleam in her eye when he mentions the garage is unmistakable and he can't help the brief smile that springs to his own face at the look on hers, that excitement that seems nearly contagious as a result of her learning something that isn't completely terrible about this place. ]

Yeah. It, uh, it was yours. I mean, it can still be yours. I started looking after it when you left, and then Poe showed up again about a month ago so we've just been kind of keeping an eye on things, trying to make sure it stays organized. There's the garage portion and then kind of this junkyard that people come in and trade or buy parts from, but — [ He looks over at her then, and with her hand still in hers, he gives it a small squeeze. ]

You'd probably know better than any of us what's worth keeping around. [ He catches her gaze and then nods down the street with a small jerk of his head. ] It's here, in the Down, if you want — do you want to go see it?

[ he barely gets the sentence out before rey's blurting out her response: ] Yes, obviously I want to see it, [ all eager, giddy excitement that seems a stark contrast to the otherwise grey nature of this place. perhaps she is clinging to this small silver lining a touch too hard, but it's difficult not to after the events of the last day or so, after finally feeling like the galaxy had been set to rights only to be thrust into some new, more miserable plane of existence.

but wouldn't that be par for the course? every small victory has been met with previously unfathomable crisis, from starkiller base to the attack on crait to the later discovery of the final order, each taxing and testing their resolve and their belief in their own abilities. they've always struggled — but they've always struggled together. it seems wrong to think finn has been here so long on his own, managing this crisis alone.

so, perhaps in a way, diverting to her (their) garage is not just for rey. ]

What is like here? What do they have? [ she peppers him with questions while they walk, unable to hide her enthusiasm. ] I haven't seen anything like my speeder yet, does everything roll on the ground like a droid here?

Yeah, it's strange, actually. Some of the tech here seems pretty advanced, like the devices they give us, and they have the train system, but then other things — [ He gestures vaguely with the hand that isn't currently clasping onto hers, sort of to imply that the rest of it is more antiquated, older, not necessarily reliant on anti-grav systems or anything that would point to being able to even so much as mimic their speeders from back home, let alone their ships. ] Poe and I have been trying to hold on to anything that seems like it could be useful, you know. For building purposes.

[ And it's the implication around that particular word, as well as the way he meets her gaze and holds it, that attempts to communicate to her without saying it out loud — at least, not while they're still relatively out in the open — that the two of them have already been working on trying to assemble something that could fly, maybe even fly them all out of here eventually with enough time and patience. But if anyone's more qualified than either of them to make it happen, it's the girl whose hand he's holding as though he doesn't plan to let it go any time soon.

He hadn't gotten very far from the garage before running into her, so it's a short walk back, and eventually they round a corner to the building itself, advertised as The G-Spot with a somewhat garish neon sign, a fenced-off salvage yard visible from the street, but he fishes in the pocket of a very recognizable leather jacket before coming up with his keys to let them in through the front door of a tiny waiting area. It's a straight walk to the office in the back, but the door on the right leads to the garage and the junkyard, and that's the one he leads her to before letting her step through ahead of him, slipping his fingers from hers. ]

Here. It's — well, all of it, it's yours. Or I guess ours now, if that's okay. [ He's looking to her face rather than their surroundings, the strands of hair that have escaped her buns to grace the edge of her cheek. ]

[ so nothing flies. it's — well, it's disappointing, of course it is, but rey has always allowed herself to find some impossible hope to fixate on, and now is no different. her hope and her heart tether tightly onto this shared dream, of finding someway up and out and away from this place and back to the part of the galaxy they know, and so the path towards it extends for her. they'll use this place, this salvage yard and scrapheap, for smarter purposes. if she has to steal parts, she will. she's scavenged before, she can do it again.

it's the sign and all its flamboyant neon qualities that really catch her attention, her gaze swinging up to it for a moment before peering back at finn with a quiet, confused expression — what's a g-spot and what does it have to do with scrap? — but all those questions are lost with an almost immediate stop as he finishes his thought with a near hesitant addendum. ]

Well, obviously it's ours. [ what's rey's is finn's, what's rey's is poe's, there is no purpose to dividing beyond that. (the only exception, really, is that finn and poe are rey's, and she's not sure how she feels about sharing them yet. but she'll get there.) ] I don't know anything about running a shop. Or whatever a G-Spot is, for that matter.

[ sorry, finn. it was going to be put out there sooner or later. ]

[ He shrugs helplessly when she aims that look in his direction at first — unfortunately, he had nothing to do with choosing the name, nor does he think that she had anything to do with it when it first became her business, but for some reason she'd kept it, maybe with a wry sort of humor in mind. But he wants to step back and let her take it all in first, this place that he's just kind of saddled her with; even if she is excited about it, even if it makes her smile (something he's never really ever going to get tired of witnessing), he figures it's a lot to process. ]

Poe and I had it signed over to our names since, you know, it's easier for him to get official approval for that kind of thing, even here in the Down, and —

[ And then his brain decides to shortcircuit when she comes right out and says it, because he knows — it's not anything he actively sought to know, but spending over a year in this city brings with it a certain kind of education over time and an introduction to things that he would never have reason to be made aware of otherwise.

The only problem is that he doesn't even know how to begin explaining it to her, and so she's going to have a few seconds dedicated to him opening and closing his mouth with no sound coming out before he finally releases a sigh. ]

It's, uh. Well, it's, um — it's part of the body. Specifically. Inside. Girls, not — [ He waves a hand in his own direction, idly wondering if the ground can just open up and swallow him right here. ] And I guess it feels good when you touch — please tell me I can stop talking about this any second now.

[ finn stumbles over the explanation, starting and stopping with vague gestures between them, but in honesty, the discomfort goes over her head. rey's exposure to sexual interactions would be hard-pressed to be described as anything but functional — she's wandered into the wrong space a time or two, seen crude grinding portrayed on a fuzzy holoscan in the outpost, even accidentally opened up the wrong room on ajan kloss and found herself witness to sight and sound on occasion, but she's never quite sought it out.

it being either the knowledge of what things were (or could be, rather) or what they felt like. so rather than blush or scramble to change the subject, rey simply shakes her head, because she doesn't understand and while finn seems eager to stop elaborating, she can't tell him to stop talking for her sake. ]

Finn, you know I've never — [ she makes a face, considering. ] What do they call it here? [ sex, fucking, kriffing. it doesn't matter the terminology when the extent of rey's own experience is aimless rutting against her hand in her bunk.

she blows out a breath. ]

You should show me. So I know.

[ fake it until you make it, right? ]

Edited 2020-01-20 20:35 (UTC)

Uh, a lot of things.

[ And he'd probably give her all those definitions and then some, most of which he's guessing she's never even heard of — and it's a surreal feeling, knowing that he's had time to learn all of these things and remembering that as of right now, at the point in time she's likely been plucked up from, she doesn't know any of it.

He hadn't asked questions the first time they'd ever been together, because he hadn't felt like it was any of his business to learn the details about who she went to for that initial experience before they'd found each other — but he can feel his pulse quickening slightly when he has the stark realization that it would be her first all over again, and he can't really bear the idea of her going to anyone else for it. ]

So you want me to —

[ It's his turn to breathe, slow and understanding, and he doesn't want to leave her with the impression that he isn't taking this seriously — that if she's asking, really and truly asking, he wouldn't hesitate to give her anything she wanted. ]

I would. But not just... so you know. [ Because he needs to make that part clear, even as he can feel the heat creeping up the back of his neck all the way up to his ears. ] Because you deserve — because you're my friend, and... I love you.

[ for a long, long moment, rey doesn't say anything at all. not out of distaste or disappointment, not because she doesn't want to hear those words — but because, in her waking memories, in all the years since she's been stranded on jakku, hot sand and burning sun beneath and above, she's not heard those words once.

she's sure she heard it as a child, in those few years in between birth and abandonment, but she'd been so young those memories hadn't formed. not really, not the way she'd have liked them to. not in the sort of way that might have softened the landing of finn's three word confession, the syllables draping over her skin like the warmest, most delicate blanket. ]

Oh. [ she's shocked into quiet — a rare occurrence, to be sure — but more importantly, into gentle consideration. she'd asked, in truth, out of practical expectation. she should know. she should know the reasoning for her shop's namesake, she should know how the process of two bodies slotting together works, she should be familiar enough to be able to navigate this place and the sorts of expectations it had laid at her feet, to be able to discuss with some kind of confidence things like kinks and pleasures and what gets you off. the sorts of questions that had been peppered in between orientation seminars, casually asked by people far more confident than rey could even dream of pretending to be.

but finn's offer isn't practical. it's emotional and raw and sincere, and rey finds she needs a moment to practice the words in her head before she can manage to echo the sentiment back, her voice a little softer now than perhaps it's ever been between them. ]

Finn — I've never loved anybody before. [ that's not right. that's not — she can feel how wrong it is before he even has a chance to react, and she scrambles to fill the pause before it can carry on too long. ] But you're part of me. You always have been.

[ she so wants to get this right, but she doesn't know what she's doing; recklessness takes over where instinct and experience cannot lay a path. ]

I think that's love. I want it to be.

[ and that's what matters, isn't it? what they mean to each other is more than just resistance allies or colleagues or friends. finn has always, always been more than that. ]

I wouldn't want anybody else to show me.

[ If this had been even a year ago for him, he probably wouldn't have said it at all — not because he doesn't feel it, that warmth for her lodged deep inside his chest that seems to spread outward whenever he finds something that makes her happy, but because he hadn't necessarily known how to back then, hadn't known the word to describe it. The longer he's been here, surrounded by intimacy so freely expressed and practically advertised on every corner, the more he's figured out what the difference is between sex and love, at least for him — and the name to put to what rolls over him, like sinking into a warm bath, whenever he looks at her, whenever he looks at Poe.

Of course, he hasn't gotten around to dropping those three words out loud with the currently absent third member of their back-home resistance, but something tells him it's slipped out anyway, in tiny increments, ever since they realized there was something more here. With Rey, maybe he shouldn't be surprised that it's just tumbled out of him like that instead, and what's more is that he feels relieved for having said it, at least. Even if she doesn't reciprocate in kind, it's out there, and now she knows, because he wouldn't be able to go through with showing her anything if she didn't know how he felt, wouldn't be able to make this some kind of mechanical demonstration to her just to get it over with. If he reaches for her, touches her, there's always going to be feeling behind it, and this wouldn't be any exception. ]

It's okay, if — you don't have to say it.

[ If she's not ready, if she's unsure, whatever her reasons are, he hasn't told her to pressure her into acknowledging it any more than she already has, and when she gives him that answer he nods once, steps close to collect both of her hands in his, gives her a small squeeze before looking up to her face. ]

What you mean to me, both of you, it's more than — it wouldn't just be fulfilling a quota, to me. It wouldn't just be showing you to show you. I — I want to make it good for you. Because that's what you deserve.

[ When he tips his chin up, it isn't to bring his mouth to hers first; he leans in to press a kiss to her forehead, slow and tender, before doing anything else at all, mostly because he knows she might need to get used to the sensation of it first, and also because he's pretty sure they're going to need to relocate. ] Do you want... we could go to the sub apartments, first? There's just the cot back in the office.

No. [ that, at least, is quick. certain. ] This is ours.

[ the garage, the junkyard, the office attached — it might belong on paper to poe first and then to finn, but it's theirs in a way that the apartments never will be. in the absence of the falcon or even her defunct at-at cave on jakku, this place is the closest thing rey has to something that's her own, something she can close the doors on and shut out the outside world for however long it takes. her answer would be the same despite the facilities inside. even if there was nothing but dirt on the ground and a slim tarping for cover, rey would choose that a hundred times over. ]

I don't need anything special.

[ it's said lightly enough, referring more to the skinny mattress and frame in her room, but there's a bittersweet honesty to the words that betrays the truth to them. she doesn't ask for much because there's never been anything to show her what to ask for, having been left with no expectations after a lifetime of solitude and scrappy self-reliance.

but there's a smile that curves up the corners of her mouth as his lips skim over her forehead, a trust that's echoed in the simple fact that rey doesn't pull away from the touch. instead, she leans in a little, lifting herself up on tiptoes just enough to press her own mouth against the apple of his cheek, a barely-there brush of warmth that's gone as quickly as it comes. ]

Just you.

[ He makes a mental note then and there to make sure that, at some point in the near future, they get ownership of this place signed over to her too — because it was hers originally and it should still belong to her, even if the stupid laws of this city say that a dominant has to be legally attached to any business owned by a submissive. But looking around, he can already see the places where they've started to leave their own mark on it: a mug Poe had left behind on the hood of an old vehicle, a jacket (not the jacket) slung over the back of a chair by the front desk. He wants her to feel like this is hers too, hers to leave things scattered around in, touchstones that serve as an indication that she's been here whenever she comes back. ]

Okay.

[ Her name on the place and her own set of keys, he mentally adds, when he leads her back the way they'd come in, partly so that he can lock up in front in order for them to remain undisturbed and partly so they can divert toward the other door instead, the one that opens up into the small office with a desk and a cot set up in one corner.

In terms of comfort, it may not be much, and they'll be a cramped fit together, but as far as privacy goes, it's away from any interruptions, and he can't help thinking she's picked exactly the right spot for them to be in, ducking his head to hide a slow smile.

Instinctively, he shrugs off his jacket first, tossing it over the back of the desk chair as he moves to her quietly, and even then it's nothing sudden, just the slide of both his arms around her waist as he steps in simultaneously to tip his forehead against hers, just holding onto her for a little while — and then his mouth goes to her cheek in a mimic of her earlier initiation, one and then the other before his lips meet hers, tentative and soft, letting her feel it before taking it in any direction she might want to try. ]

[ she'd never given it much thought before. if anything, rey had always been a little dismissive of the shows of affection on base or the niima outpost. it was just kissing — just mouths pressed together, sometimes in brief touches and sometimes more animalistic, but at the end of the day, it was just two mouths touching together. there wasn't anything to be awed by, no reason to be jealous.

but in that moment, as finn's mouth presses to her own, as sweetness and warmth and the echo of something settles in her chest, rey thinks she might understand. because there wasn't anything particularly special about it, nothing new or novel in a simple kiss, but there was everything in the gentle way he held her, in the slow lingering sensation of his lips against her own. there was love and adoration and careful, gentle sincerity — and beneath it, barely there, the sudden and undeniable knowledge that it wasn't just a kiss.

so she follows it, going on instinct alone, her head tipping to the side just enough that she can press that much more firmly into the embrace, her arms lifting to loop around his neck so that she might pull herself in. she may not know what she's doing, but she knows she wants to be doing this with finn, and that's half the battle. ]

[ He's doing it all with her in mind, mostly, but there's a part of him that can't disguise his own reactions to it, of how it feels to kiss her, again, but also for what feels like the first time too in how she acknowledges it, responds to it in her own way, tilts her head to let it naturally deepen and then slides her arms around him too — and he thinks he could just stand here like this kissing her for hours if that option presented itself, dedicate his time to relearning the fit of her mouth against his own and all the ways he could make her sigh.

But if they're here for something else, for more, he wants to make sure she gets that too, and even now he's breaking away from the kiss after a moment to gently let his lips trail down the curve of her jaw and against her neck, small brushes there as he voices a soft sigh across her skin. She's so soft there, places where he almost would have expected roughness, but her natural scent is stronger too and he can't completely subdue his own enjoyment of being the one who gets to touch her. ]

Just tell me — if there's anything you don't like, okay? [ He says it quietly, close enough for his lips to brush against her throat before he nuzzles there, over her pulse point, still holding her close. ] And I'll stop. Or go, whenever you're ready. For, you know, more.

I'll tell you, [ a promise and encouragement both, mingled with the low sound of an exhaled breath as his mouth skims along her throat. it's a sensation unlike anything she can recall in memory, a caress and a tease in equal measure as her eyelids flutter shut, blocking out the strange new space she's found herself in to focus entirely on all the things that are good about the moment.

the scent of him, the comforting pressure of his touch, that uniquely reassuring presence that is finn that's always at the edge of her mind, that particular strand of force-energy that ties them together when they're close like this — all together, all good, as she clings to him, committing every millisecond of this moment to her memory so that she might be able to recall it in the future. ]

You don't have to stop.

[ she trusts him. he knows her well enough to know she might be new at this, but she's hardly fragile — and more importantly, hardly mute. if there was some rare occasion of something she didn't want him to do, he knows full well she'd tell him... or make him stop, if she had to.

but she doesn't think she will. she can't think of anything he could do that would be the kind of thing she wouldn't like. ]

Okay. [ And that's all he needs, that out-loud reassurance, because he trusts her enough to be honest with him and he knows she trusts him enough not to take this in a direction she isn't comfortable with — but he also doesn't have any intention of this being anything but dedicated to her and what she needs, what she wants to experience, what he can hopefully give her.

It's not as though he isn't getting something out of it, the scent of her skin filling his nose, the softness of her throat beneath his mouth, the way her waist feels beneath his hands and after a beat he's walking them over to the cot itself, sitting down first and then gently drawing her down to sit in his lap. ]

You might, uh — [ He chuckles, trying not to sound nervous, but his fingers pluck around the edges of her clothes and he kisses her again almost to center himself, guiding his palm against her jaw, his thumb caressing the apple of her cheek. ] You might have to help me with some of this. [ Getting around it, or beneath it, or even taking it off if she's comfortable enough to; his arms retreat from her so he can take the lead on some of it, reach behind his own back to pinch the fabric of his shirt and secure a grip to tug it up over his head. He'll be the only one naked here, if it helps. ]

[ despite rey's inexperience, despite the fact that all of this is as alien as a buffet meal, she still sinks into his lap like it's a place she's been a thousand times before, legs easily lifting to straddle him on the skinny cot. it's maybe not the best position for later experiences, but for this? it feels right.

this close, she can follow his gentle encouragements and let her free hands unfasten the strap of her leather belt, then the billows of her tunic, slipping the folds over her shoulders and her head until it all pools on the floor somewhere behind her, leaving them both bare to the waist. there's a quiet to the motion, a hush that's fallen around them, until rey swallows hard and licks her lips, until she leans back in to press her mouth against his own, a little more comfortable now, leaning in a little more to soak up some of his warmth and his confidence both.

when they part, just enough to let in a breath of air, not even enough to open her eyes, rey murmurs a few words against his mouth. just a few. ]

What next?

[ When she slips herself into his lap to bracket him between her thighs, knees gently dipping into the mattress beneath them, it takes everything in him not to just wrap his arms around her and kiss her until they both need to break for air — but right now, in this position, there's no way she doesn't realize the obvious effect this is having on him, the hard line steadily growing harder and practically nudging against her inner thigh every time she so much as shifts her weight to peel off another layer.

And then they're both on even footing in terms of the amount of clothing left between them, but he doesn't even have time to let it sink in, really, before she's kissing him again, before his hand rises to cup her face, thumb sweeping against the high curve of her cheekbone, and he leaves his want there, in the way it builds naturally between them, the subtle tilt of heads that deepens it before she breaks away to speak.

Next, he thinks, it's about making her feel good, and he's got enough knowledge accumulated from prior moments almost exactly like this one, but not quite, to know that if he drops his lips to the slope of her shoulder, kisses his way along that freckled juncture and then descends further to continue over the plane of her chest as his hand simultaneously sweeps upward to cup beneath, to urge one sensitive swell up towards his mouth to kiss, to part his lips for a tongue to slowly swirl over —

— well, he'll just get to relearn exactly what sounds she'll make when he does all of that, unable to withhold his own sigh at the scent, the taste of her skin, and knowing he'll only keep making his way down the length of her if she tells him to keep going. ]

[ kissing finn is like breathing. it's easy, effortless; the want swells and rises with each pass of lips and tongue against each other, a warm bath of desire that rey sinks into without thought or hesitation, and when his hand cradles her face, there's a sudden but unsurprising awareness that she'd be content to simply stay like this for as long as her breath would allow. she'd be happy to linger in this warmth for hours if she could, just mapping out the parts of him she's never had permission to seek out before, memorizing the sensation of his hands against her cheek, the gentle drag of calloused fingertips against her skin.

then he breaks off, pulls away just enough to drop his mouth against her shoulder and then her chest, and rey finds this isn't wrong either. it's different, but no less good — no less deserving of the breathy exhale it earns or the gentle coo of his name that comes when his tongue drags up over a particularly sensitive spot. his devotionals earn all of that and more, the sigh that spills out from his mouth over her skin drawing a shiver that's easily mopped up in the warmth of his hands spanning across.

but while she might be inexperienced, and while this may be as new to her as the line down her throat, there are some things that don't require training or teaching. some things are simply instinct — like the way rey arches into his touch, the firm line of his arousal pressing up against her as her hips roll for friction she's not sure what to do with yet. all she knows is that it feels good, in a greedy sort of way, to combine the gentle, insistent patterns of his mouth and his hands with the giddy high that comes from each exploratory shift of her weight and roll of her hips, each pulsing wave of arousal a new experience. ]

Finn, [ gasped, as her head tips back, as her hands curl over his shoulders for support in keeping herself balanced, ] Show me. Please.

[ not just this, but all of it. ]

[ He's not even going to draw attention to the way she's already needily working her hips against his from her perch on his lap — partly because it feels good, but also because he doesn't want her to feel embarrassed about it and stop as a result of him pointing it out. He already knows from his own experience that some things just come naturally, by instinct, like the body's own way of processing sensation and trying to do something to seek out more of it, and the more she moves on him like this the less he's going to want to deny her any part of getting to experience it.

But he also knows there's a way to go about this and it involves building her up slowly, steadily increasing the firmness of his kisses as he coaxes his lips over all this newly exposed skin, paying very close attention to the specific sounds she makes every time he approaches a new spot or does something different with his mouth, whether it's gentle kissing or the wet slow circles of his tongue drawing invisible shapes and patterns across her body. ]

C'mere.

[ She's never been much to lift, and he doesn't know how little she'd had to sustain herself on in Jakku, but he can't help noticing that she's all lean and slender muscle now in place of the smaller frame that she'd had when he'd first met her; regardless, he only has to slip one arm around her waist before he's picking her up, relying on her to grip him with her thighs as he brings her over that short distance to lay across the cot itself, with every intention of continuing right where he's just left off.

He might need more of her help with everything else, layers that he doesn't want to remove without her encouragement, but for the moment, as he kisses her, he's going to slip a warm hand beneath the waist of her trousers to gently cup her between her legs as he drops his mouth to her breasts again before one finger traces her slowly, testing. ]

[ this, at least, is not unfamiliar. being splayed out on her back, the hesitant cup of a palm against her skin, fingertips tracing through to catch the bare hint of arousal. she has done this part herself, though rarely with such patience or purpose, typically at night out of instinct alone, a hand slipping down to rub off some itch that gradually ebbed away.

alone, she simply got bored of it, and forced herself to stop. there was little pleasure in it then, no experience in what it could be encouraging her to try.

now, though, she can feel the difference. her body arches into it without any encouragement from her mind, hips arching up when his hand slips beneath the waistband of her trousers as if to make it easier for him to slide them off altogether, and though she is surprised that he doesn't, she doesn't push the issue.

she's too busy trying not to rock too eagerly against him, first his and then her own bottom lip caught between her teeth as a rumbling sound echoes in her throat, smothered by a groan. ]

That feels — [ good, yes, but. not enough. just the barest hint of a promise. she's not good at waiting. ]

Yeah? Tell me.

[ It's not necessarily him demanding anything in the vein of dirty talk, closer to encouraging her to just be open with him about what she's feeling, what she wants more of, to keep that line of communication open even while he's touching her in ways that are probably more than a little distracting.

There's a testing too, in the hand that dips between her thighs, and while he isn't necessarily surprised to find her wet it's another thing just to feel it, to have that evidence painting his fingertips as he groans around the curve fitted between his lips again, lashes that sensitive nipple again with his tongue. ]

You feel good.

[ And he's not going to make her wait before slipping his hand free, curving all his fingers beneath the waistband to coax her into lifting her hips again, into slipping off that layer; he wants to situate himself between the spread of her legs and refamiliarize himself all over again with how she tastes, what she likes, his shoulders rolling forward to kiss one of the subtle dimples on the inside of her knee before his mouth trails down and in along a soft inner thigh.

It'll be a tight squeeze on the cot and frankly, he's probably going to hang off the foot of it a little in this position, but as she'll soon come to learn for herself, he'd have no problem with staying down here for hours, using mouth and fingers to build her up over and over. ]

[ finally bareskinned, the cooler air dragging goosebumps across her skin, rey lets out a shuddering breath. it isn't hesitation or regret, but rather simple exhilaration, the reality of the situation hitting her in earnest now as his hands skim over her thighs and hips. that, after everything, after wars and battles and losses, they're here. that finn has been here for longer than she understands, that he's learned so much in her absence — things he wants to show her, now and in the future, one by one.

she manages an exhale as her hips settle back on the cot, a sound that's half a coo of his name when his mouth dips back down again, and then a word or two. not much, just enough to try for him. ] You're warm, [ is the first and most obvious thought, his skin against her own easily a few degrees warmer than the air above. but it's more than the simple temperature. it's how his touch seems to bloom heat across her skin, a teasing spread that stretches to each new spot that greets him. ]

I want — [ what does she want? she's not even sure she knows. the only word that comes to mind feels like it's not enough to express the tug she felt when his fingertips brushed through the slick of her arousal. ] More. Of you.

So are you. [ Warmer than she had been when he'd first started touching her, and he can't help feeling like it has something to do with that, the heat of anticipation and arousal coiling inside his belly and then spreading outward until the hands that skim over her thighs are nothing but warm when they touch her, when he feels her arch and shudder beneath him. It probably goes without saying that he wants to give her more than his hands, eventually, his pants more than a little tight at this juncture, but he's not about to jump ahead too far, too fast.

So he's veering in, giving another kiss to a soft crease where her hip meets her groin, and then he's sure she can feel his breath over her, hot and full of want before he kisses her again, between her legs, a soft press of lips before they part for his tongue to sweep over her, slow and purposeful, over and then delving in to taste her at the source. ]

Rey. [ He'd almost forgotten what this was like, and he needs to commit this to his memory all over again, fingers slipping in between to spread folds for a leisurely, repetitive licking; he's groaning too, soft exhales of need breathed over her, and if he wasn't hard before it's about to get even worse now that he's here, tongue swirling around and then up to circle her clit. ]

TDM #10

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